http://freezedriednews.com/2009/07/08/obama-to-combat-climate-change-by-moving-planet-earth-farther-from-the-sun/ Political Satire & Commentary Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:46:17 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.com/ http://freezedriednews.com/2009/07/08/obama-to-combat-climate-change-by-moving-planet-earth-farther-from-the-sun/comment-page-1/#comment-34 Fri, 10 Jul 2009 02:56:03 +0000 http://freezedriednews.com/?p=323#comment-34 There is good news and bad. Yes, it will affect sports bars’s satellite ESPN, but their denizens will be so plastered that they are unlikely to notice until they have been melted by nukes. As for the Martians, my sources there tell me they are lonely and looking for company, in particular something along the line of Hef’s Playmates. Obama has failed to address this critical issue, but no doubt an apology will be forthcoming.

]]> http://freezedriednews.com/2009/07/08/obama-to-combat-climate-change-by-moving-planet-earth-farther-from-the-sun/comment-page-1/#comment-32 Thu, 09 Jul 2009 23:14:37 +0000 http://freezedriednews.com/?p=323#comment-32 This is fantastic! However, there may be protests from the Northern Koreans who don’t have enough nukes to counter Al Gore’s. My concern is more immediate, will it affect sports bars getting satellite ESPN? These are exciting times to be a citizen of the universe! It might piss off the Martians?

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